Maybe it was never meant to be. Just maybe...but my stubborn ass kept pushing it, wondering what could possibly go wrong. I mean after all...who cares an

ymore? I wasn't even worth the breath at the end, the time it would have taken to fix things...simply just too late.

So I just send a text??

My Goliath, forever in my heart...

I remembered you, with a smile

Thanks For All the Love

I miss the little sounds you made

That were only meant for me

The droopy stares you shot my way

Knowing no one else would see

I smile when I think of you

Peacefully resting up above

Because I can hear you calling me

Saying "Thanks for all the love"

Homeward Bound

Watching you grow was such a joy

From the little ball I first brought home at only 5 weeks old

To the companion always by my side

Amazed at the trust you gave me

Comforted by the love we shared

Looking around at your favorite places

The hidden spaces I would not have known

I realize those corners are the graces

That has made my heart your home

New Mourning

I mourn for you when the days slow down

When the sun begins to set and things get quiet

I reflect on the time we spent slowing down

Settling down, drifting, dozing, dreaming

Side by side we slipped into another morning

Now when the first day's light hits my face

I know you've waken and are reaching down

To say good morning, to help ease my mourning

Because you are a light that will not fade

Smile Again

You're gone but not forever.

I smile when I see pictures, remembering all the good times we spent together.

I am strong;

Even stronger, to speak the words of our memories to others.

To smile, when I don't want to smile.

To laugh is easier as days pass by.

You're with me forever in my heart.

A treasure deep within to steer me on.

A precious gift that will not fade.

You were more than my pet, my friend, companion, and my family.

And they're gone!!!

You see that picture up there on my lil family banner? Avery has braids,sometimes I liked him with braids, sometimes I hate the way they looked. The minute he got out the army he grew a fro and corn rolled his hair. Being in the military limited his hairstyle choices, so he just cut all his hair off bald for the 14 yrs he was in the Army. I met him that way, with no hair, see that pic over on the right with lil Avery? That's the Avery I met and that's the Avery I knew for almost 13 yrs.

Lately, he's been doing a lot of thinking out loud, he said he was gonna cut his hair off and then he didn't. I thought ok, whatever, he won't ever cut it off again, but I just sat by silently and prayed that these fucking braids came off. Then today before he headed out to California, he cut them off!!! I gotta say I am NOT sad to see them go!!! LOL

Grades...

are out. They have been out for awhile but I've been kinda busy. I got all A's!!! woo hoo!! Yes I was so happy, I think I smiled for like a week straight! LOL...

Anyway, this being my first post of 2009 I want to take some time to wish everyone a Happy & Healthy 2009!

ME...

Before my math final...I was burned out with school, I always get like this towards the end of the semester. oh well...

But I can't tell you how glad I am this is all over! Last semester I decided that if I didn't do well this semester I would change my major.

Calculus is kicking my ass! Although I have NO idea what happened there. I used to be good at math...but I guess 10+yrs between High School/college, a couple of kids, and a shitload of partying will kill a few brain cells, LOL. So here I go again, next semester brings yet another calculus class into my life(yes I have actually been passing)I am so tired of math. I wonder who is ever gonna ask us if we know the x intercepts of a polynomial function but oh well, what the hell do I know?